1. Purposeless, as if I could fly away, aim toward the crystal moon. A sliver awaiting my arrival in a pale, porous evening sky. This silent retreat gliding on speculation, the web of solace promises sleep if nothing more.
2. First I stole your cloud, the overhanging arch of delicate freedom. The abandon impossible in lesser states of grace: I said, kiss this. And you waited your entire life for more danger.
3. The neighborhood looks so bloodless on a Sunday afternoon, spillage from churches and synagogues, and temples. Here is time on the diabolical watch: blood, eternal as an ancestor.
4. We swapped sexes for a while, suited us swirling seaside. Nothing separates us from each other, holes are deepening even still. We say we are dissolving into sky, our breath piquant with rumors, whole beings frantic for the leap, the sweet light that follows.
Hi Roberto!
OH those P’s and S’s! YES!!
purposeless, pale, porous, promises sleep, impossible, spillage, separates, deepening, leap
sliver, sky, silent, speculation, solace, sleep, stole, said kiss this, Sunday, spillage, synagogues, swapped sexes, suited us swirling seaside, separates us, still, say, dissolving, sky, sweet, follows
so much to love in this! bloodless into spillage, blood eternal as an ancestor
And all of section 4 is sensational! LOVE to read it aloud! This is gorgeous! YES!
I am always in awe of this kind of writing, Robert, because of the creative leaps and metaphors (…cloud, the overhanging arch of delicate freedom…time on the diabolical watch) I wish I could develop in my own work! Sticking to alliteration, there’s so much of it here…sliver..sky. Pale, porous. Silent…speculation…solace…sleep. It’s not in-your-face alliteration, it’s just the right touch. Sunday…spillage…synagogues. Swapped sexes, suited, swirling, seaside, separates, still, sky. Leap, light, frantic, follows. Bravo. – Faye
Robert, love this and some great lines . . .
“I said, kiss this. And you waited your entire life for more danger.”
“Nothing separates us from each other, holes are deepening even still.”
“ . . .whole beings frantic for the leap, the sweet light that follows.”
Love how alliteration propels this forward. And how it ends! “whole beings frantic for the leap, the sweet light that follows”
Beautifully written Robert..a love story beginning and ending with the sky, finding purpose. My favorite line: “ The abandon impossible in lesser states of grace:”
Just beautiful.
G
Such a beautiful lyrical flow, Robert! Each numbered item is a world on its own. This line is so amazing:
“Here is time on the diabolical watch: blood, eternal as an ancestor.” Yeow! I love the ebb and flow, the swapping of sexes, the more passive, observational sections partnered with the more active ones. It’s a seductive pendulum swing.
Robert, what a gorgeous piece! There’s something timeless about the sensibility, painterly, poetic, imbibed with wonderful surreal strangeness. I’ve read it many times, as it rewards multiple readings due to its complexity and richness. Wonderful!
Robert, wonderful work! The 4-part harmony and structure. Lot of killer lines in here. I even think we had some parallel diction with our day 1 work; we share some of the same words, some of the same vibe, which is really cool. I think Meg’s workshop (and work) is conducive to these awesome sort of obtuse explorations of darkness and light. Really nicely done.