Superhero Dialogue

The movie director yells cut. “Cut!” the movie director yells.
“Popeye” is supposed to be dead in this scene,” the director screams.
“But Popeye can’t die,” Popeye replies. The director shoots him dead.
Pink Panther steps away for a cigarette break and says nothing.
Val Kilmer asks for his stunt double, asks for another sandwich.
“Did you manage to eat all of the salt?” asks Leonora Carrington.
She’s staring at the glass window as if the window might talk.
Not long after, Samurai Jack arrives and tries on a new hat.
A flat top hat, one he knows will not be cut with a blade.
Scooby Doo’s crew arrives too late to solve the mystery.
They remove mask after mask, burlap sack after burlap sack,
and find nothing more than tree stumps and warm dogs.
“Let’s be gone,” says the Mystery Machine, before being
stripped of its parts so Michel Lotito can have dinner on camera.
“I’ll be famous,” Lotito says, stripping the paint off the van’s siding,
finding a bag of mushrooms in the trunk. He bites them and chews them
and says they’re still fresh, a chunk of metal resting in his limpid fist.