Switching Gears

…And now, in the final leg of this course, we’re switching gears slightly. Here we’ll focus on when loss is actually a good thing, or maybe even times when loss was a cause for celebration.

Loss most commonly has a negative connotation, but sometimes, even often, there are things we need to lose, or let go of, if we are to be healthier, more mentally settled, assured, and confident.

This can be a loss of weight, overcoming addiction(s), ridding oneself of an unhealthy partner or friend. It can be the loss of rage, resentment, the loss of torturing oneself.

In a way, it’s like flipping the typical meaning of loss on its head, where loss equals power, redemption or a kind of maturation that might not have otherwise happened.

Sometimes loss is forgiving oneself, or others. It can be a sense of letting go that frees us, as in this fantastic piece by Susan Nguyen: 

https://poets.org/poem/how-forgive?mc_cid=17070d82cf&mc_eid=e3ca271837

Other times loss is about forgiving others, and thereby freeing ourselves.

“Holding onto anger is like eating poison and expecting the other person to die.” Ann Lamott 

Have you ever lost a cherished item of some sort, been despondent about it, then bought a replacement which you miraculously liked even better? I have totaled a few cars in my day, nothing I’m at all proud of, and they were always favorite cars, but every time I replaced them the new model or version was so much more enhanced than my previous vehicle—new sound system, better graphics, improved steering and safety measures, etc. Try writing about what you lost and mourned that turned out to be a lucky thing in the end.

You may like, or abhor, country music, but this song by Luke Combs fits right into the notion I’ve just spoken of:

Sometimes losing something seems like the worst thing that’s ever happened to us in the moment, but with a bit more time, and reflection, it actually ends up being the best thing that could have occurred. There have been a multitude of times I’ve bought a new house, and almost always the house I thought I really, really loved, got taken out from under me, and then the actual house I purchased ended up being far better. For instance, I now live on a small lake in the hinterlands. But the house I thought I wanted was across the lake. We’d made an offer on it, then the next morning the deal fell through. Turns out that house sits in the shade 80 percent of the time, while ours gets daylight sunshine 80 percent of the time.