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Italian Lemon-Almond Bars to KILL For!
METHOD
Prep time: 15 min Cook Time: 60 min Makes 24 bars
[Ingredient list] [Find ingredients at Amazon.com]
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★★★★1/2 of 3.4k reviews
Impatient, are we? How could an overall rating
of 4.5 steer you wrong – right? Start by sifting
600 g flour. But I’m not going to let you off
that easy, girl. Three thousand of your ravenous
peers have passed through this portal, mostly
unscathed. I don’t bite *smiley face.* We disclaim
any responsibility for poisoning or other ill effects.
It’s not like we’re in your kitchen. Ha! Lord no.
And it’s not like you’re really here for the food.
Oh, no. I insist. Get your double boiler going
over a medium flame. Such a shame you chose
to pass over my illuminating travelogue describing
how I wrested this method from a tight-lipped nona
on a rocky Sicilian slope. Old bat didn’t stand
a chance! It has since become my most requested
recipe at the kids’ fundraising bake sale. Food
is always story. Like every war, it’s about resources.
Ya feel me? This particular citrus achieved peak
ripeness under decades of duress of a punishing
pruning regimen. How’s your own midline shaping
up in midlife? Husband been working late lately?
LOL. A deal with the devil gets me a blue ribbon
at the county fair year after year after year. Easy
as pie! Enter your email here for a free-book! None
of the other cheerleading moms can quite get
the technique down. Don’t you want something
they don’t have? Take down the blue Fiesta Ware
bowl from your grandmother’s estate. Yes, on
the shelf above the sink. Oh, doesn’t everyone have
one? That’s just America. Still waiting on that
email, doll! Love the curtains! Would be a perfect
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invisible girl in high school. Don’t you want to –
Fuck it, we’re coming in. Really might want to do
something about the locks on these windows! Mmmm
smells good in here. Ready to level up on your desert
making, as the kids say? I’m going to go ahead and
drop your cell phone into this double boiler. Ah, that’s
better! Look at these knives. Girl, you been holding
out on me. Sure you don’t want that free e-book? I
thought so. Use a paper doily to sprinkle on powdered
sugar and serve!Your family will be so impressed. Be
sure to rate, review, and subscribe! Alexa, call Peter’s
mistress. Click here for even more recipes.
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