The first time Jack’s Uncle Frank “got his nose,” Jack was disturbed to say the least. He immediately brought both of his hands up to his face to feel if it was still there and it seemed like it was. But Uncle Frank said he “got it” and adults aren’t supposed to lie. Uncle Frank was sure to put Jack’s nose back in place before Jack could run to his room and look in the mirror just to be sure. He pulled on his nose in disbelief.
There didn’t seem to be any cracks or anything leading Jack to believe his nose had just been separated from his face and hastily reattached. When Jack broke his piggy bank and his mom had helped him glue it back together, there were cracks to show that the pieces had been apart from one another. His mom told him when something is broken and put back together, it’s stronger than ever.
The second time Jack’s Uncle Frank “got his nose,” Jack slapped his Uncle’s red face and grabbed the offending large hand with both of his small ones and tried to wrestle his nose out of his Uncle’s vice-like grip. His Uncle Frank just laughed and laughed. Jack could handle it when his Uncle Frank pulled quarters from behind his ears. After all, that was how Jack filled up his piggy bank in the first place. But he just couldn’t take this “got your nose” shit anymore.
Jack learned in his fifth-grade science class that there aren’t any bones in the human nose, just cartilage. As Jack started to cut off his nose with the red Swiss Army knife his grandfather gave him for his tenth birthday, he thought to himself, he’ll show those sons of bitches. No one was ever going to “get” his nose again. Of that he was damn sure. When he was done, he would put it in his piggy bank for safe keeping.

Eric Andrew Newman lives in Los Angeles with his partner and their dog. He works as an archivist for a nonprofit foundation by day and as a writer of micro and flash fiction by night. His writing has appeared in Atlas and Alice, Ellipsis Zine, formercactus, Gargoyle, New Madrid, Pithead Chapel and Quarter After Eight, among others. He is at work on his first chapbook of stories.