- Somebody said, “The world is pointless, all we do is sit around looking at screens,” and the class went dead silent.
- First of all, who says such a dumb thing?
- Second, d’uh, what else is there to do?
- Thirdly, I don’t have a thirdly, actually
- Class dismissed 10 minutes early; Mrs. Brannington did not look well, shooed us out with the back of her hand and leant back in her chair for an afternoon nap and maybe some pills.
- Substitute teacher, so worksheets. Long division? I’m not like four.
- Why are substitute teachers so hot?
- Why are their talents not being used elsewhere, yet here they are in the semi-purgatory of a 2pm afternoon class for Year 10s?
- I finished the worksheets in like two minutes.
- The end of the day. Geologic time creeps ad finitum. Somebody farted, let one rip so loudly that the room lifted in laughter all at once, a collective exhalation.
- Breathing (or ventilation) is the process of moving air into and out of the lungs to facilitate gas exchange with the internal environment, mostly to bring in oxygen and flush out carbon dioxide.
- Breathing has other important functions. It provides a mechanism for speech, laughter, and similar expressions of the emotions.
Jonathan Cardew’s writing appears or is forthcoming in Wigleaf, Cream City Review, Passages North, Superstition Review, JMWW, Smokelong Quarterly, People Holding, and others. He is the fiction editor for Connotation Press and contributing books reviewer for Flash: The International Short-Short Story Magazine. He’s been a finalist in the Best Small Fictions, the Wigleaf Top 50, the Bath Flash Fiction Award, and he won a travel toothbrush once at a boules competition in northern Brittany. Originally from the UK, he lives in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.