My son holds a crocodile inside. A crocodile dwells inside my son, fully fledged, cajoling him to let go, to leave, to launch into orbit. Orbit the oozing bayou that offers him a fragment of freedom. Fragments of freedom lurk beneath the surface, and he is always hungry. He is always hungry, seeking sustenance and fills up with promises like eggs of lies, yet the famine in the forest fovea of his eyes wants more. His forest eyes want more, so he scrapes and scratches among the murk, then crams crawdads and crickets into the crocodile, even as he stars the sky and trembles loud limbic thunder. Loquacious limbic thunder chirps his needs, worming rain into him, as though worms can satisfy the hunger of a carnivore. The carnivorous hunger swells, but his crocodile legs claw back, and he is lost.

12 Comments

  1. Faye Rapoport DesPres

    Soooooo creative and awesome, starting right with the first sentence! Then there’s the alliteration…fully fledged, crocodile…cajoling..let, leave, launch, orbit, oozing, fragment, freedom, he, hungry…one sentence leads right into the next and you feel as if you’re just riding along with the words. I love the experimentation with verbs towards the end, something I want to try…”chirps his needs,” “worming rain into him.” Brava!

  2. Todd Clay Stuart

    Meg, this piece has your unique elan, your signature force. The alliteration and wordplay, the unexpected denominalization. Great work as always!

    • Georgiana Nelsen

      Todd, I apparently failed to log in when I posted and so this showed as Meg’s. That anyone would accept it as such is high praise! Thanks!

  3. Meg Tuite

    Hi Georgiana!
    WOW! You not only worked gorgeous language through alliteration, but you rocked the word chain! fully fledged, fragment, freedom, fills, famine, forest fovea, forest
    crocodile, cajoling, crams, crawdads, crickets, crocodile, chirps, carnivore, carnivorous, claw
    leave, launch, lurk, loud, limbic, loquacious,
    orbit, oozing, offers,
    “He is always hungry.” I love the repetition and that title that tells all!
    This is fantastic! It’s a beauty to read aloud! Outstanding! LOVE!

  4. Koss Just Koss

    Wonderful piece. Love the restating, repetition, very vaguely reminiscent of a villanelle . . . but surprisingly impactful in prose. Full of surprise language.

  5. Robert Vaughan

    Hi Georgiana, not sure I’ve ever read something as creative and outrageous like this from you! Love how you utilized Meg’s prompt about following the word chains, the repetitive nature of that really sets a tone, almost hypnotic in a sense. Also, your bizarrely effective idea about an animal, a crocodile, which most people think are so “dangerous.” Yet indigenous cultures revere them (all animals, really) in certain ways. I love that you toy with this concept, and with (not sure why I wanted to call him Paul?) Also, then we can toy on what the metaphorical implications might be- since the protagonist is a male adolescent… Hmm!!! LOVE THIS.

  6. Sara Comito

    Okay, so fovea is now my new favorite word! I love the image of the boy cramming crawdads and crickets into the crocodile. It’s a creative piece, Georgiana!

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