He runs in a wild circle over and over, coming close then veering away. Celebratory! Neighbor says the obvious, that my appearance and behavior are the trigger. Like I don’t know. Still, I’m silent as my spirit soars in witness to the excitement. It’s who I am and who he is, Roguere that is, my horse! We’re both in and of the now.
Tough journey getting here for both of us. Said his head used to be afraid of his own shadow back early on. Haven’t a clue what happened to him in those youngest days, just someone must have been abusive, or maybe he was abandoned early. My projection is mostly meaningless, and likely influenced by my own upbringing, or lack there-of.
Always a voice in the background counters my endless inner chatter that renews and rewrites the past into present tense, whether it be of matter or not. The mostly unknown transformed early into a workable fiction for this girl. Past and present time co-exists equally in my batter of cognition. Roguere’s too, I think. That oxheaded horsebrain of mine!
Roguere’s take on reality and his power cracks wonder right open in a serious way. I think too little that now is all there is, though everything seems filtered through it. I didn’t name him. I did learn there were Rogueres deboarding a ship from Ireland/England back in 1820. Multiple generations between then and now, whoever we were.
Once this ‘untamable’ horse got his head turned toward the sun, and no shadow showed, his inner horse-chatter seemed to dissolve. His unbound confidence now shines. Maybe it was just caring attention that wore him down. We’re bound.
My mount and anticipation strive to calm me more than him. There’ll be none of calm though. His celebrity joy takes us off on this glorious run. My inner mind roils a ‘Hold on!’ That momentary fear has become padded in a smirk and silenced joy. We celebrate survival.
hi John,
thanks for sharing. your piece was enjoyable on its own, and deepened with research into the two words that stuck out most to me, ‘Bucephalus’ and ‘Rougere’.
i did not have the historical context about ‘Bucephalus’, at first read. i love how you played with that history and made it mythic.
the use of ‘Roguere’ works on at least two levels that i see: as a cultural marker for French immigrants; as a pun-like misspelling of rogue.
the piece has a lightness, an airiness that feel like horse running in circles. the chatter is there, grounded in the bodies in motion.
i appreciate the playfulness of the piece and wonder who ‘this girl’ is.
i feel like the phrase ‘in a serious way’ undercut the the literary tone of the sentence it’s attached too. if that was intentional, bravo. i could see such a reversal as serving the voice of the narrator. if not, perhaps that’s a cut.
Very fun to read and ponder! And yes I had to look up Bucephalus and Rougere (which I hope I got right; as a derivative of rogue?) So I learned a few things too. Always a plus.
The voice and point of view are intriguing. The “I” and the “untamable horse” which I read as aspects of the same self (whether rightly or not lol).
Favorite bit: “Always a voice in the background counters my endless inner chatter that renews and rewrites the past into present tense, whether it be of matter or not. The mostly unknown transformed early into a workable fiction for this girl. Past and present time co-exists equally in my batter of cognition. Roguere’s too, I think. That oxheaded horsebrain of mine!” The “batter” of cognition and the “oxheaded horse brain.”
Thanks for sharing!
Hi John, what a romp, this celebration of horse-man- Roguere & Bucephalus- WOW! Enjoyed the ruminations, I am horse-related!!! Grew up with all things horsey. Farm, stalls, pasture, saddles, riding, shows, gaits, lessons. I love these beasts and I adore the conflation between horse and man you explore here. The circular manner in which the piece unfolds, like atop the horse itself. The voice, also, has a “bent” twist to it, and the present tense assists to keep us moving along with the tempo. There’s no holding back this steed!!! “HOLD ON!” indeed!
John, thank you for introducing me to Bucephalus — I read that he may be the “most famous” horse in history. I especially like the first paragraph: “He runs in a wild circle over and over, coming close then veering away. Celebratory! Neighbor says the obvious, that my appearance and behavior are the trigger. Like I don’t know. Still, I’m silent as my spirit soars in witness to the excitement. It’s who I am and who he is, Roguere that is, my horse! We’re both in and of the now.”
Hi John — I hope you can still get this. I, too, had to look up Bucephalus. but I love the energy and soul of the piece,
The sense of holding on and letting go carried me through the piece, and your writing, as usual, is steller.
The joy in the ending wraps it all up perfectly.
John:
This story had me jumping around in the symbiotic relationship between narrator and horse… or maybe two horses and their temperament and history. I was metaphorically jumping as the characters gave off the vibe of endless energy that I remember from my own youth. I love stories that bravely dive into the world of creatures and imbue them with human-like qualities.
As a boy, I had a horse that seemed to read my mind and we almost “finished each other’s sentences.” You are channeling something pretty cool here. “I’m silent as my spirit soars.” I’ll say.